Let go of toxic people, even if it seems harsh. Choose ‘you’.

Let go of toxic people, even if it seems harsh. Choose ‘you’.

Let go of toxic people, even if it seems harsh. Choose 'you' 2017: by Oendrila De JustODThings

Let go of toxic people, even if it seems harsh. Choose ‘you’.

If one of your fingers gets affected by sepsis, you must have it amputated. Even if it feels wrong, to get rid of what has been a part of you forever, it must be prevented from spreading the toxicity to the rest of your body.

Learn to recognise the toxic people in your life. They may be good people deep down, but they are not good for you. Let go of them. It may be hard to let go, and cut a person off. It may feel like you’re being harsh. But sometimes, that’s the only option you have, and you must learn to take it. Learn to recognise the patterns of passive aggression, manipulation, and emotional blackmailing. A tiresome relationship, with repetitive behavioural patterns that give you fear, obligation and guilt, is not worth saving.

Sometimes, certain people, through no fault of their own, will do nothing but harm your mental health. These are the people who call you a friend and use you as an emotional crutch. The truth is, such people make you feel like their lives depend on you, till you grow a god complex and dysfunctional relationship addiction. The truth is, they are narcissists who stew in the soup of self-pity and self-inflicted loneliness.

A friend, a lover, a family member, a colleague – it can be anyone. Sometimes, the narrations of their experiences remind you of moments and situations that cause your old scars to start throbbing again. Sometimes, these people expressly encourage you to dig up the past you’ve already buried, just so that they can get the feeling of solidarity in their dark place. Often, they manipulate you into feeling guilty for having friends who bring you light.

You do not owe anyone your strength, attention or constant presence by neglecting your priorities. You do not owe anyone your tales of lonely battles. It takes a lot of hard work and courage to defeat darkness. It takes a lot to stay in the light. No one is worth revisiting memories that can leave you shaking and shivering, questioning your life choices and your decisions. No person is worth all the drama, anxiety and depression.

Let go of toxic people, even if it seems harsh. Choose ‘you’.

Choose Light. Choose Happiness. Walk away from toxic people, even if they mean no harm: JustODThings

Choose Light. Walk away from toxic people, even if they mean no harm.

Cut off the negative influences that try to snuff the light out whether or not intentionally so. You do not owe them a warning or an explanation. Don’t feel ashamed of getting rid of dysfunctional alliances with toxic people. You’re not responsible for their darkness. It is not your task to help them out or give them company there, especially when you are not comfortable. You have the right to stop being a constant giver.

So, does that mean you must be a selfish loner, leaving anyone who asks for help alone? No. Don’t forget to be helpful. Don’t make yourself an intimating, emotionally distant, cold cynic. Remember to offer empathy, lend an ear, give a shoulder to the one who needs it. But, stop when it starts to make you feel drained and disturbed. Recognise emotional abuse, even if it is at the risk of your abuser feeling scandalised.

When you find it too much to handle, when a relationship leaves you no space to breathe or vent, or no option to choose which one you want to do, say it. Someone who truly cares for you will understand. Reserve your efforts, if you have it left in you, to help someone reaching out to you to pull them out; even that feels too much, sometimes. But, walk away when someone wants to drag you down so that you can give that person company in a place of darkness.

Everyone person is flawed, and has a baggage. You are, too. Your person is someone who makes you feel comfortable even in silence, someone who offers solidarity, strength, positivity and light. Hold on to relationships that transcend geography. Prioritise people with whom you don’t need to make an effort. Embrace every opportunity to grab happiness in the middle of all that you have to deal with in your own life.

Stand up for your peace and mental health. Choose happiness and light.

Choose ‘You’.

There's no shame in letting go of toxic people, and choosing those who make you happy: by Oendrila De JustODThings

There’s no shame in letting go of toxic people, and choosing those who make you happy

[Image with Quote – Pinterest
Images of me – Sushmita Ganguly]

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Oendrila De

The unique, odd, crazy journey of OD, i.e. Oendrila in the world of fashion, food and everything else in this big, bad, beautiful world.

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1 Response

  1. June 8, 2018

    […] person’s image from my mind using an eraser. Later, I realised that this is a valid form of letting go of people or things when, in an episode from The Big Bang Theory, Penny (Kaley Cuoco) taught Sheldon (Jim […]

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